“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”
Tear down the wall
Building up confidence has a lot to do with breaking down barriers. These limitations are often self-imposed by our relentless focus on negative experiences, comparing our self to others, and self-defeating mantras like “I can’t do it”, “I am a terrible speaker”, “My writing stinks”, “I am not creative” – the list can be long.
Then we compound the situation by hanging out with like-minded people who also have those same negative patterns which end in non-action.
Nike really hit the target with their slogan: Just do it. I love it because the root of the message is ACTION.
What are you prepared to change to make it better?
Just becoming aware that you are turning the volume up on negative thgouts is a great first step. Once you are aware, fill that space in your mind with positive thoughts: What is your vision? What do you believe in? What action can you take to move towards that goal?
Toolbox for Confidence.
Building confidence is a multi-faceted construction site: it starts with a mindset that shouts – “I can!”. It involves asking yourself and others: what are my strengths? Luckily we all start out with a nice package of talent that is just there by nature. Perhaps it’s your charisma, your intellect, or your persistence. What is it that you truly enjoy doing? What traits and talents come naturally to you?
So your toolbox for building confidence has a I-can-do mindset and a keen awareness for your nature talents.
Add new skills.
If your natural talent is to make people laugh, but your voice is low and inarticulate, you can learn a new skill: better voice skills. If you get bogged down in facts and figures, you can add storytelling skills. Public speaking can benefit from many different skills. Some of these skills you will have naturally, and others you can learn. Even proficient speakers can continuously improve something.
Lastly, it really is about “just doing it”. Find places where you can talk in public. You can start small: a focused face-to-face with a stranger or friend. And get bigger: a toast at a friend’s wedding, a presentation for your company, a talk at an international conference.
Each experience will challenge you in new ways. And make mistakes, please do. Just make new ones, again and again. After you speak, reflect and ask people for honest, motivating feedback. But protect yourself from the negative nay sayers whose criticism cuts you down rather than supports you up.
Have the end in mind.
You can’t build a house unless you have the design. You know exactly how it is going to look at when it is built. The same applies for building confidence. Have the end in mind: describe the speaker you want to become. Be precise and be generous. When you know where you are going, it’s time to start. Step by step.
Coaching can be a powerful guide
If you would like support on that journey, perhaps we can help. We coach people who would like to build their public speaking confidence.
Reach out and send us a sign. We could see if it’s a good fit through a 30-minute telephone or video call. This talk is without any obligation (it’s completely free).
Build confidence by breaking down barriers. Here’s a hammer!
With joy from Berlin,
Dyane Neiman is the Moving Speaker: www.moving-speaker.com. She helps business professionals at all levels, who want to enjoy speaking in public, in English. She always encourages people to be proactive when they want to see change in their lives. Get in touch at firstname.lastname@example.org
Copyright © 2015, Moving Speaker Training, All rights reserved.
Tag: speak with confidence